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If you find that you are struggling with a newly found interest in men (or their penises), a sex therapist or counselor may be able to help you better understand your fantasies and address your feelings in a more direct way. Society is often very hostile towards homosexuals or anything not straight, to be precise. And for many, the thought of being gay is scary. Sometimes, it can be challenging to know what you’re into, especially if you’re still young. If you decide you want to act on your desires, you can take a look at the Related Q&As. This quiz is for those who are unsure of their sexual orientation. And fantasies involving people you don't typically have sex with are normal many people have fantasies that they do not intend to act on. Having a fantasy about giving oral sex to someone of the same gender doesn't necessarily connote being gay, as you note. In your email, you mention that "guys don't turn me on at all" and that you don't "have any homosexual tendencies." It doesn't seem as if you're bothered by the fantasies rather, you are curious about them. In making fantasies real, be prepared to like it, hate it, be disappointed, relieved, indifferent, or have many other related feelings. You might omit the realities of mosquitoes, sand where it doesn't belong, sunburns on "tender" areas, the pesky hermit crab that might crawl into your discarded swimsuit, etc. Say for instance, you find yourself daydreaming about sex on the beach. Sometimes idealized fantasies, however, are more pleasurable than the real-life activity. If something you fantasize about, such as performing oral sex on another man, really turns you on, you can decide to keep it in the realm of fantasy or you may decide it is something you really want to do. Often the fantasy of breaking social taboos is erotic.
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Using fantasy or imagination, you can break away from the "norm" for a while. In your thoughts and dreams, you can be more aggressive or more passive, in the setting of our choice. Sexual fantasies allow you to explore sexual desires, feelings, and behaviors without actually choosing to do them. Whether or not a person has the ability or actual desire to do these is often secondary to the escape and joy that fantasy provides. Or they may dream about playing sports with a pro, having lunch with a senator, or even hooking up with a celebrity. People may daydream about being James Bond or a Charlie's Angel, a rock star, and/or a famous chef, for example. Fantasies are a great, safe way to explore exciting events and situations - that you may or may not actually want to do.